Me: Hey Fluff. What’s with the sign?
Fluffy, the bearded dragon: I’m protesting! I’m stuck in this so-called habitat.
Me: What’s wrong with your habitat? You have 5 levels – 5 rooms – all to yourself.
Fluffy: Have you looked at my floors?
Me: Well yeah. Some of it’s woven beachmat – pretty cool stuff – and some sand, etcetera.
Fluffy: Etcetera? I didn’t hear anything about tile.
Me: Tile?
Fluffy: Yeah, tile. Like you have — tile floors I can’t get to on my own.
Me: I get it, Fluff. It’s mid-summer and you wanna cool your dogs…so to speak.
Fluffy: Oh-my-gosh you’re quick!
Me: Nobody likes a smart-ass Fluffy.
Fluffy: Whatever.
Me: Ok, chick. Just don’t blow any fire on me and I’ll help you to the tile floor.
Fluffy: Gee-but-whiz it’s all I ask of life!
Me: So dramatic, Fluffy! Here ya go. Fluffy’s free!
Fluffy: But not cheap! Take the sign will ya? It’s heavy.